Manhattan Carnivore

This is a TRUTH Blog.

Sunday, July 31, 2005

The Legend of Bob Dylan

Hey kids, let me tell you a tale of the legend of Bob Dylan.

Saturday, July 30, 2005

Ummm... Like... Do I Like Want The Fame?

I'm not quite sure what to make of The Fame? Their music is best described as bubble-gum-rock, quite delicious, but the kind of music you'd expect kids just out of high school to be playing... and the guys and gal in The Fame have quite a few years and miles between where they are now and high school, and frankly, that makes me a little suspicious. Maybe that's just me being a jaded New Yorker, but with The Bravery being the last band to "make it" out of New York, I can't help but be a little suspicious of guys in their late 20's (generous age estimate) releasing a debut ep of radio ready rock, that is hip now, yet slightly ahead of the current musical trend.

Now there's nothing wrong with being old, or getting old, hell I'm getting old as I write this, but by the time a musician is in his or her late 20's, he/ or she has had alot of time to put some miles in. Chris Martin is in his late/mid 20's and his band has already released 3 albums and is playing Madison Square Garden. The Strokes are entering their mid 20's and they are about to release album number 3, and here we have The Fame releasing ep number 1 and playing Pianos. By now we all know about The Bravery's past and how deep their love for 80's dance rock goes, which leaves me wondering how deep The Fame's love for good old pop rock goes? Is Reno truly passionate about "Bedford Girls" or this just an attempt to cash in what is hot today? And if The Fame are truly passionate about the type of music that they are making, why hasn't this been a life long quest of theirs, rather than a pre-mid-life crisis quest?

Just as their biography says, "These are songs to blare from car stereos in high school parking lots across the country. Homework is thrown on the fire." The Fame write songs that would be at home on teen movie soundtracks. Picture this potential scene: it's the day after prom (the prom scene featured The Bravery's dance anthems) and the kids are driving along with the top down in their Cadillac blasting The Fame. Their debut ep, while flawed still kicks some serious rawk n roll ass, and alot more ass than their live show, which you'll have plenty of opportunities to see in September at their month long residency.

For More on The Fame: (official site)

"Keep The Money, We'll Take The Fame" - New York Press (Cover Story)

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Top 10 Things To Do Instead Of Seeing CYHSY Tonight/ 1Week Anniversary of Vicious Suck Fest

When Audrey and Jasper got together a little over 2 years ago, they shared a common vision and goal; exposing budding local talent to the world. To commemorate the 2nd Anniversary of their joint venture “Vicious” (the monthly party they had created to realize their vision) they decided to host the first annual Suck Fest, a show where the bands were so crappy and over-rated that they would leave everyone feeling sick to their stomachs about the state of music.

To commemorate the 1 Week Anniversary of Suck Fest, I have come up with a list of “The Top 10 Things To Do Instead Of Seeing (Suck Fest Super Stars) CYHSY”.

My friends, read on…

10. Make that dreadful phone call home to “Say Hi To Your Mom”

9. Start an Erika Forster fan site.

8. Go see Last Days.

7. Apply for that job at American Apparel.

6. Go see The Plus Ones with NYC’s gayest up and comers Surefire at Southpaw (the very location where Suck Fest took place!) And no, The Plus Ones are not Johnny Kaps’ band, and yes, I was disappointed too. | |

5. Dig out your Tae-Bo videos.

4. Make dried cranberry/ peanut butter on rice cake sandwiches for all the neighbors.

3. Track down that “missed connection” from that craaaazzyyy late night out on the LES.

2. Read the new Harry Potter book for like the gazillionth time.

1. Go to the Clap Your Hands Say Yeah “Crap In” outside the Mercury Lounge. Full description of the event in this craigslist post:


Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Your Plans For Tonight...

Tonight, The Harlem Shakes finish off their month long residency at Pianos, and I suggest that you go and bring flowers for their injured guitarist, Ian. Ian is a supper cool guitar slinging cat who apparently also rides vespas and injured himself doing so last week, right before they were slatted to perform at the first night of the two day Vicious Suck Fest. Well, The Harlem Shakes rock and shake so much that they decided to shake things up and invite their ex guitarist Dan to come shake it with them tonight so they can finish of their residency and not disappoint the masses. You can read the full story at their website:

Also, you may want to go listen to their new demos recorded by Phantom Planet's Sam Farrar and Mixed by Britt Myers in the "Shake-Pod" at their exclusive residency website:

"A Night" is really good, the rest... eh... not so good, but they're listenable. Anyways, go see them.

Life Is Not A Rehearsal, And Blogging Is Not A Competition

I would just like to make it clear that Manhattan Carnivore the blog is not trying to compete with Brooklyn Vegan the blog. The blog title is a joke, its ironic, because in case you didn't know, irony is fucking cool with the hipsters... so now you know, so you can be fucking cool too. And yes, I read the comments on my blog, but no, that does not reduce me to the level of shit that Joe from DoP holds, because THIS IS MY BLOG, I AM KING HERE, but, I am a good king, so I like to see what the commoners are saying and may try to take that into account while running my kingdom. I do not intend to post everyday if I have nothing to say, I will write when I want to write and write what I want to write, and if you want to read it, wonderful, if not, thats wonderful too... we know our buddy Joe will continue reading from work.

In other DoP news... it is reported that George was sighted in the hipster capitol of the universe working at Main Drag Music. This folks, is truely ALARMING! If you were at suck fest, you witnessed the noise that George created, and will therefore understand how alarming it is that George would work giving advice on anything music related. sheesh!

Saturday, July 23, 2005

Good News For Hipsters Who Are Tired Of Bad Music

The Stands make good music. This is a fact. If you saw them when they visited us a few months ago, you know this. Sure, they wear their influences plainly on their sleeves, but these boys can play and write songs that its pretty safe to say, would've been hits in the 60s. Unfortunately, these days their retro pop makes them somewhat of novelty act, and not even a plug from Noel Gallagher, or a tour with Jet was able to bring them into the mainstream consciousness, so of course a post on this blog won't do too much either, but...

They have a new album coming out called "Horse Fabulous"... yes, it is called "Horse Fabulous"... and, if you like good music, you might want to take a listen to it... not because it's cool, or revolutionary... but just because its kinda nice and your ears might enjoy it...

Friday, July 22, 2005

Dirty On Purpose Get Lamer With Every Passing Moment

So I wake up this morning to find 11 comments on my little blog, and links to it up on The Modern Age and (my arch rival) Brooklyn Vegan. Holy Fuck! I’m becoming famous in blog land! Woot woot!

I know some idiot will take the above seriously and post a response to it, so let me make it clear, it is a joke, sarcasm if you will, so keep your self righteous mouths shut.

But, I digress… we must discuss Dirty On Purpose, and how by responding to Ms. Modern Age’s post “Sausagefest… On Purpose?” they have proved how lame of a band they are, and how lame the NYC music scene is becoming, or has become.

Lets recap…

Around 11pm on July 20th, Dirty On Purpose take the stage at Southpaw to play an unforgivably horrendous set.

Sometime early on July 21st, Miss Modern Age post’s a review of the show…

By 7:58am on July 21st, Joe from Dirty On Purpose has responded to this post just “to clarify”.

By 11:51am on July 21st, Dirty On Purpose’s manager has also posted a response to clarify and defend the band.

THIS IS SO LAME, because now everyone knows that you get off stage, run home to your computer to see what the blogs had to say about your show.

THIS IS SO LAME, because now everyone knows that you get all worked up over a little criticism.

Here’s a little “Rock History” lesson for DoP. Every band ever has been criticized, but the good bands don’t pay attention to it and get wrapped up in it, usually because they’re busy creating… and as artistic and creative as you guys pretend to be with you’re noise, you’re not fooling anyone. You’re not pushing the boundaries of music by getting onstage and making noise. Songs still matter to people, that’s why Dr. Dog, despite fucking things up by going on late, were the highlight of the night. They played songs, and you didn’t and, in case you didn’t know, people like songs.

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Reborn a Blogger at Suck Fest

Some folks are born bloggers, some are born again bloggers, and folks, I’m a born again blogger… and it all happened last night, at the second night of the Vicious 2nd Anniversary show.

Alright, so enough religious hoopla, and half assed justifications for starting a blog… the real truth is that some things need to be said about some bands, and by God, someone has to say it… and I really swear, I will stop referencing God and religion now.

So the show…

I arrived fashionably late (9-ish), hoping to catch the end of Dr. Dog’s set, only to find out that Dr. Dog hadn’t gone on yet, and refused to go on before 10pm. Okay, so WHAT THE FUCK? Since when does the OPENING BAND decide they’re not going to go on until 10pm, and push everything else back… well the answer to that is obvious, that was the first time I had ever seen or heard of such bullshit.

But fortunately, it gave me the opportunity to catch their set.

Dr. Dog opened there set with a song that grooved exactly the same as Oh bla di bla da, by this band, you may have heard of them?… The Beatles… but proceeded to get funkier, and more hippy-ish (as did their set). The best description that I can give of Dr. Dog is… picture The Thrills, but sloppier and more out of tune, with a crazy hippy guitar player who they let out of a cage for shows, and quickly stuff back into a cage at the shows end. This being said, Dr. Dog were actually quite good. They have some good songs about dreams and people belonging and other sorts of good hippy stuff, and they’re crazy hippy guitar player does a nice job evoking Neil Young.

Go listen to them:

(listen to “Wake Up”)

Brooklyn based, Dirty On Purpose followed Dr. Dog’s hippy jam with 45 minutes of noise. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with these guys honestly? They used to have a beautiful keyboard player who everyone was content with staring at, while the four idiots, I mean boys, I mean young men, I mean quickly aging men trying to retain there youth played unforgivable noise… but somehow, these idiots thought that it would be a really good idea to kick her out of the band. HELLO GUYS! NEWS FLASH! THE ONLY REASON ANYONE EVER LET YOU ONSTAGE TO MAKE YOUR NOISE WAS BECAUSE YOU HAD A BEAUTIFUL KEYBOARDIST, BUT NOW YOU DON’T, SO: YOU JUST SUCK. Besides being noisy, they’re singer thought it was a good idea to talk about “buzz band” Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah like between, every single song… as if to say, “Look how cool we are, we know about Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah. We know you are all here to see them. We’re going to try to build indie credibility and get a lot of ‘Cool Points’ and say there name a million times.” I tallied Dirty On Purpose’s “Cool Points” at the end of there set. The tally looked like this: 0

The suck fest continued with Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah…

In case by any chance you’re not familiar with Crap Your Pants, Say Yeah… let me give you a brief background on them…
Pitchfork gave their record a 9/10.

Brief background over…

CYHSY took the stage to packed house, rumor has it that they were the reason night 2 of the Vicious 2nd Anniversary sold out, selling between 300-350 advance tickets (at press time the exact number was not able to be confirmed, representatives from Vicious did not return out phone calls).

Ok, sorry, back to the brief background, I need to draw a quote from Mr. Brian Howe of Pitchfork, this is how he closed his review.

“We have the rare chance to decide what a band sounds like of our own accord before any agency cooks up and disseminates an opinion for us. Damn, maybe this is how it's supposed to work!” – Brain Howe June 22, 2005

That being said, 300-350 Pitchfork readers stood and pretended to enjoy CYHSY, as if they had just discovered David Byrne. If you’re trying to discover David Byrne, I have some recommended listening for you:

The Best of The Talking Heads

You might want to try starting with that.

About 60% into there set, CYHSY’s singer (who’s actual name is Alec Ounsworth) added harmonica to some of their songs, which clearly alarmed those who had come to see David Byrne and company, so at this point in the set a mass exodus occurred, with about 50 people leaving (this only set the table for the mass exodus that was to come after their set). After a few songs dabbling with harmonica, CYHSY got back to their roots, whipping out what seemed to be a version of “The Night Before Christmas” poem set to 80’s-ish music, only circa 2005. This people liked, because, honestly, who doesn’t love a little poem that reminds them of childhood. My apologies if this review sounds like Bitchfork, but I seriously would like to pose the question: Did anyone actually listen to the music that CYHSY were playing? Did anyone hear the goat noises Alec Ounsworth was making?

Additionally, I recommend that CYHSY talk to Dr. Dog and find out where they can get a cage for their tambourine player. Fuckin’ dude is crazy hyper and needs to calm down, it’s only a tambourine, and PLEASE, can you at least shake it in time with the drummer in your band?

Closing the night were local favorites Saints and Lovers, formerly known as Sons of Sound. Saints and Lovers had somehow? managed to grab the headline spot at the sold out Crap Your Pants, Say Yeah show, unfortunately, by the time they took the stage at some ungodly hour of the morning, everyone had enough crap in their pants for one night, and had gone home. It was quite sad to watch the people streaming out of the club as the Saints tried to quickly set up. By the time they went on, only 34 people were in the room (this is a fact, I counted)… so that would mean that about 90% of the people left, which sucked for Saints and Lovers, but never the less, dude can fucking sing, and sing he did.

Texas born, but Brooklyn reborn indie God, Ben Kweller was sighted outside mingling with the common folk, trying to stay current in what appeared to be a slightly desperate attempt to stay relevant.

Thank God that suck fest is over.