Sunday, November 27, 2005
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Diamond Nights - The Girl's Attractive Video
"The Hottest Record In The World Today!"
I'm afraid Richard Ashcroft has now forgotten how to write songs that are even half decent. I'm actually embarrassed for him, and for Chris Martin who oh so recently called him "the best singer in the world." Maybe at one time, but now he's as gay as James Blunt. Have a listen to his new single "Break The Night With Colour", with a grand introduction from Radio 1.
Richard Ashcroft - Break The Night With Colour
Richard Ashcroft w/ Coldplay @ Live 8 - Bittersweet Symphony
I'm not quite sure what I think of Arctic Monkeys, they didn't blow me away at bower, but I can't say I hate them (I know you're disappointed). Unlike CYHSY, DoP, WAS (and all those bands I hate) Arctic Monkeys are kids (not 30 year olds pretending to be kids), so they deserve a little time to make some mistakes and figure some shit out before I jump on them for sucking. When I figure out whether or not they suck, I'll be sure to let you know... in the meantime, do some reading...
Prefix Mag Arctic Monkey Interview:(link stolen from BV)
Arctic Monkeys / Prefix Mag Part 1
Arctic Monkeys / Prefix Mag Part 2
do some listening...
ATT: We Are Scientists, Please Go Back To Science School
Everyone always complains about girls not being honest, not saying what they mean… so I’ll be honest, maybe even blunt and say exactly what I mean… I HATE We Are Scientists. I hate them a lot. I may even hate them more than I hate DoP… and trust me, that’s a lot. Right about now you’re probably wondering… “MC, why do you hate WAS?”… its simple really… I hate them because they’re terrible, pretentious, snide, little hipster bastards and I wish I could shove their jagged little guitar lines and their 16th note hi hats down their throats until they choke on their own shitty music. God damn it! I guess they didn’t get the memo I put out to all bands… for all of you not in bands (or for those of you in bands that SOMEHOW didn’t get the memo) I will publish the memo below:
To: All Bands
From: Manhattan Carnivore
WE DON’T NEED ANYMORE JAGGED DANCY BANDS. PLEASE CEASE AND DESIST IMMEDIATELY, OR I WILL BE FORCED TO GET YOU DRUNK, BREAK YOUR GUITAR OVER YOUR HEAD AND DRAG YOU HOME TO YOUR PARENTS HOUSE IN THE SUBURBS AND SHOW YOU TO YOUR MOTHER AND SCREAM INTO HER WRINKLY FACE, “YOU THINK YOUR SON IS DOING SO WELL MOVING OFF TO NYC, WELL LOOK AT THIS!!! THIS IS WHAT YOUR SON HAS BECOME! A USELESS DRUNK IN A JAGGED DANCE BAND. I HOPE HE’S MAKING YOU PROUD.” THEN YOUR MOTHER WILL FEED ME A NICE HOME COOKED MEAL AND THANK ME FOR BRINGING THIS TO HER ATTENTION, ALL THE WHILE SHOWING ME EMBARRASING HIGH SCHOOL PHOTOS OF YOU AND THEN SHE WILL PAY FOR MY TRIP BACK TO NYC. SO, DO THE WORLD (AND YOURSELF) A FAVOR AND STOP!!!
Ok, so that was the memo… now back to WAS. God, they’re fucking terrible! Here’s a lyrical sample of their terribleness (yes, terribleness is a real word):
Lyrical Sample of WAS Terribleness:
The day you move
I'm probably going to explode
It's true, I'm probably going to explode
Oh oh oh oh, woah oh oh oh oh
You'll pray for proof,
I'm probably making this up
It's true, I'm probably making this up
Oh oh oh oh, woah oh oh oh oh
Because my body is your body
I won't tell anybody
If you want to use my body
Go for it, yeah
I was almost about to analyze those lyrics to explain to you how terrible they are, but then I realized that there’s really nothing to analyze and that anyone with any sense what so ever will immediately understand how terrible those lyrics are… but if there is any doubt… just go listen:
WAS have successfully blended hipster jagged guitar dance punk with emo. Congradu-fucking-lations lads, this combination equals an appalling mess that can’t quite be considered music.
And who the fuck do WAS think they are having an “advice” section on their website? Kids you’ll get better advice from the guys standing outside a methadone clinic than you will from WAS, for Christ’s sake, just listen to their music..(I know its painful and I’m really not advocating listening to WAS, but just listen for a second)… see… its terrible, you can’t trust guys who make terrible music to be giving you advice.
My advice to you: DO NOT LISTEN TO WE ARE SCIENTISTS.
My advice to WAS: QUIT.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Tricia Romano forgot to ask me what I'm thankful for. Well, I think we all forgot to care what Tricia Romano thinks anyways...
Monday, November 21, 2005
For Now, I'm Back
Please people, stop writing letters to me asking me to update my blog...its clogging my mailbox, i know that its been like a hundred years and I've missed like 10 next big things and what the fuck is up with all the posts like:
I find this blog very interesting and I will come back often.
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Can someone please explain this to me? Is this a joke? or just a terrible business idea? post away... i hope its bringing in tons of revenue for you kids.
As for some good news, Dr. Dog signed to Rough Trade and will be taking their hippie jam to the masses man... yeah, they're gonna like totally bring down the corporations with their sweet psychedelic harmonies man, its like a revolution vis a vis music.
breaking Dr. Dog News over at Bitchfork
And if you've been wondering what I've been up to... the answer is: n2m... jc...u? oh and also i've been spending ALOT of time looking at these dirty photos...<
Friday, August 19, 2005
It seems that Columbia signed Elkland ages ago, but Elkland have yet to hit their stride. Their record is alright, and their video for "Apart" is kinda cute, with Jon Pierce dancing around like a temperamental toddler, and with Columbia behind them you'd imagine they'd be pretty popular by now... but no. Even after 10 nights opening for Erasure at Irving, Elkland are still playing clubs like The Delancey, which they did last night, along with a host of god awful bands. One reason Elkland isn't successful could be because Jon Pierce believes its a good idea to wear pink pants and a half zipped sweatshirt onstage. While he may look like a toddler in their video, in person he is a hulking and massive man, who looks like he could be on the Russian Gymnastics team... teamed up with tiny guitarist Adam Kessler and tiny keyboardist Joel Tarpin, who look like brothers, its an interesting stage dynamic to say the least. Oh, and Jon's real brother Jesse drums for them. Their set last night was short, possibly too short, but people seemed to enjoy it, especially the gay guys. Even if Elkland don't ever become hit makers for Columbia, they could still become quite successful with the gay crowd.
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
Starsailor Set To Make Comeback With All Important 3rd Album
Just as the Coldplay propaganda machine has reached full effect, and the backlash is starting, as reported on themodernage.org... Starsailor, one of those mellow band to emerge post Coldplay is set to make a comeback with their 3rd album, released on Oct 17th. The album is called "On The Outside" and was produced by Rob Schanpf (Beck, Vines etc), Capitols go-to guy for producing all their mainstream "indie" records.